New Years Eve!!!!

As I mentioned in my precious post (two posts in two days..I'm on a roll) my mother will be coming into town today to spend the night so the Mr. and I can go out and bring in the New Year right! I am SO excited I can barely contain myself. Now, I'm not excited about leaving my baby behind, but I am excited to have someone else that I trust keep her while I go off and live a little.

I can't recap what's happened, since, well it hasn't happened yet, but I can tell you what the plan is....
Sushi
Shrimp (bleck)
Chicky Chicky Chicken
Boooooooze
Kinect
CornHole
Toasts
Kisses
Bed.

Sounds like a good night to me!

Now since tomorrow is the first day of 2011, I should have a resolution ready and prepared to begin.
Well, I don't.
It's usually always been my resolution to quit smoking. Guess what?! I did that this year! I still have moments of weakness and want to smokesmokesmoke, but I don't. How selfish would I be if I did? My poor baby would have to smell the stench of cigarettes every time I held her, her clothes would stink..etc.etc.etc.
It's not fair to her, and so, I wont be smoking.
Now the only task I've yet to complete is to get the Mr. to quit.
Maybe that should be my resolution. Or his.

If I think of something for myself, I'll let you know. Until then, enjoy tonight.
Eat, Drink, and be Merry.
But don't drink and drive, it kills people.

2 Months Old!!

So today my little one is two months old. Where has the time gone? It seems like just yesterday I was downing black cohosh, and doing acupressure trying to jump start my labor...only then to be in said labor for oh, 20 hours or so.

She's so stinkin cute. She smiles all the time, and follows you with her big, blue eyes. Granted this last week she has turned into the newborn I remember quite well. She went from waking up once during the night to eat, to getting up 3 times at night..again. Boo. I am one tired momma this week, but it's ok, I'll survive. This will only go on so long and then she'll be going off to kindergarten ::cries:: I can't begin to think about that yet. She also weighs 11lbs 1oz!! A big jump from 7lbs7oz!! AlsoALSO! She got a glow worm for Christmas, she freaking LOVES that damn thing, she will stare at it forrrrrrreverrrrrr! (She got a penguin pillow pet as well, and since she's too young to really enjoy that, I guess momma will get to keep it all to herself;) )

Tomorrow is New Years Eve, and my mom is coming up to spend the night so Ariana will have a baby sitter. This way she is in her own environment, and I don't have to ask someone else to keep her so late at night. The Mr. and I are really looking forward to having a night away, spending some quality adult time with friends. When I say "adult time" I mean we'll be acting like 10 year olds playing Kinect. (With a little drinking thrown in!)

Here's a picture of my pretty baby! I'd add more, but my connection is sloooow right now! Gotta love free wifi!

Merry Christmas

I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas! Or Happy Holidays, whichever is less offensive.

I guess I should update...

Since my last post things have changed a bit.

We finally made it to the pedi who prescribed baby A some Zantac. While it's only been 2 days, I can already see a difference when I'm feeding her. I hate that she has acid reflux, especially since I've had heartburn maybe once in my life, so I have no idea what she's going through, but I'm glad they diagnosed her and gave her something to make it better. They also decided to give her her 2 month vaccines. I thought it was just going to be a well baby visit so I hadn't prepared myself for what was to come. 3 shots, and an oral. It.Was.Awful. When the nurse gave her the first shot she screamed and didn't catch her breath right away, which was sad, but babies do that sometimes, but my mom just happened to be there and she went ape shit on the nurse who almost didn't wait to give her the second shot once she had caught her breath. Picture my mom being a complete bitch yelling at the nurse for almost giving my kid a shot while she wasn't breathing. Now, don't get me wrong, she wasn't turning blue kind of not breathing, she was exhaling from crying and it lasted a little longer than it usually does. But come on, she's a nurse, she knows what she's doing, she does it everyday. Anyway, we stopped off and picked up some infant Tylenol and headed home. She was not happy at all that night. I thought most babies sleep after getting their shots; not mine. Not until screaming for hours did she finally go to sleep. The next day she was fine as frog hair, so everythings ok!

The best friend anyone could ever ask for has been spending the days with me this week to prevent me from going insane from loneliness. As of Monday I had hit my breaking point and needed someone to be here with me. Yesterday we spent the afternoon doing a little last minute Christmas shopping, and had lunch at the Olive Garden..yum. Baby A did pretty well, fussed a little, but I think it's because she knew I was trying to eat. She has a tendency to want to either be held, or fed as soon as dinner is ready. It was her first time in a restaurant and I've got to admit, she did very well.

So I'm feeling better emotionally, but now, I'm sick. Of course. Sore throat, pitiful cough, body aches....yep, that's me. I'm praying I don't get my newborn sick, that would be terrible. So everyone please cross your fingers that she doesn't come down with something.

Well tomorrow is Christmas Eve. The Mr. will be home (yay!) so he will be hanging out with the little one while I make Red Velvet Cake Balls for Christmas dinner.
Check them out HERE.
I'm really looking forward to it, and I hope they turn out well! Christmas Day we'll be making the hour or so drive to have lunch with my mom's side of the family, and them making another 30 or so minute drive to have dinner with my dad's side. Every one's excited to get to spend some time with baby A, and I'm excited to get to eat some delicious food!

Before I go, I've got to give a shout out to a couple of amazing ladies who made me realize that this infant stage will get better, and there's a light at the end of this hellish tunnel. Thank you so much Carol and Max! It's nice to have someone who's been there give me some advice. I ordered the book 12 Hours Sleep by 12 Weeks Old (thanks for the recommendation Carol) and I plan on starting it New Year's Day!

I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas.

Broken

This may be long, and run on, but I can't say that I'm sorry, because I'm not. I've got more important things to worry about than my blog entries being perfect.

I am at my wits end. I honestly don't know what to do anymore. I need help. I need someone who knows what the hell is going on to come and help me, and take care of the child that I cannot.

I am her mother, and cannot soothe her cries. She screams, and screams and it absolutely breaks me heart. I don't know why she cries. I don't know. I've tried everything imaginable to fix it, to make it better and I just can't. I am at a loss and I don't know what to do anymore.

All she does is sleep, which is fine, if she wants to sleep, then so be it, I'll let her, but when she decides she is ready to eat, she gets furious. She turns red, screams bloody murder, thrashes her head back and forth and will NOT take the bottle. It wouldn't be so bad if it weren't just me at home by myself, if I had someone to help me. She'll scream, and scream, and scream. I literally have to get her to sleep to feed her. I broke down last night. The Mr. worked until 945pm and I had been alone with her all day dealing with her screaming. And then when it was time for her to go to bed, it started all over again. Finally I just handed her to him and let him attempt to make it better. He got her to sleep but as soon as he put her in the bed she was up again. I held her and attempted to feed her and she screamed. So I put her in her swing. Instant sleep.

Is it colic? This only started happening a week ago, shes 6 and a 1/2 weeks old, wouldn't colic have kicked in earlier?

Is it her formula? Does it upset her? She is fine during her late night feelings. Eats with no problem, and goes right back to sleep. So I don't get it. Wouldn't the formula bother her at all of her feeding?

Am I trying to feed her too often? Is she not as hungry as I think?

I don't know what to do anymore.

Do you really need a title?

It's been a week or so, and I apologize for the delay. Nothing spectacular happened, so don't get your panties in a wad.

My kiddo slept from 9pm last night until 3am! It.Was.Wonderful. This has only happened twice now, and it is amazing. I feel like I could do anything after nights like this. She went back to bed and slept until 6, ate, then back to bed a final time and got up at 830. She woke up gagging and choking, and coughing and sneezing, so I'm thinking she may be coming down with something. I hope not, so I'll be giving her even more love than usual to (hopefully) make her feel better. I sucked her nose and throat and took her temp just to be on the safe side. No temp, luckily so maybe I'm just being paranoid after hearing about everyone suffering from a bug.

She started this new trend lately where, if she's hungry, she will fight like hell. It's frustrating because we know she's hungry, but she'll scream and thrash her head back and forth until she finally gives up. My mom, God bless her, says we should give her either cereal in her bottle, or water. Um..I've done lots of research mother. Babies don't get cereal until they are at least 3 months old. And as far as water, not until she is 6 months is she allowed to have even just a few drops. Once she is 1 year old she can have as much water as she likes, and until then, she wont be getting any. Better safe than sorry. Times have changed mother.

I did a little research and asked a popular baby forum for some suggestions as to what we could do to help with this issue. Someone suggested we swaddle her. We had been doing this up until a week or so ago, and we stopped when she stopped sleeping in her bassinet. She didn't seem to mind not being swaddled, so we figured no big deal. Well, we swaddled her up, and she ate like a champ giving us NO fight at all. I think we may have solved our problem, and she slept 6 hours straight....coincidence? I think not. Thank you Internet stranger for making my life a little better. She is currently sleeping soundly, swaddled in her swing. (Say that 5 times fast!)

My brother in law is in town for the week, which is super exciting, since he is my favorite member of the hubs family. He is also the first of them to meet baby A! He was very excited to meet her! The rest of his family will meet her when either we go to Tennessee and visit, or when they come here to visit. We shall see.

Also! Christmas cards went out TODAY!!

Back to work, and a sneak peek!

It looks like this weekend I'll be going back to work. It doesn't really feel like maternity leave is ending since I'll only be working on Saturdays and Sundays, so I'll still be home all week by myself with the little one. I'm excited and happy to be going back to work, but I can't help but think that it's really just going to be a pain the the ass. I mean, those days are the days that the hubs is home and he lets me catch up on sleep that I missed during the week. I can see it now, I'll be scheduled to be there first thing in the morning both days, so I'll be super tired and any chance of me being able to sleep in will go right out the window.

It's fine, we need the extra income right now anyway. Not that it's much, but some is better than none.

Income tax time is rapidly approaching. And although I'm usually excited about blowing our extra money on superfluous shit, I'm extra excited about it this year because we're (hopefully) getting my happy ass a car. I have been without a vehicle since March! Do you know how bad it sucks to have to rely on other people to transport you from place to place?! Even if you just need to pick something up from the grocery store? It sucks. I hate being stranded. I should probably also mention that the Mr.'s car is a stick shift, and although I've attempted to learn, I've never mastered driving the damn thing. So aside from borrowing a friends car once or twice, I've hardly driven at all in 9 months! 9 MONTHS! So, God willing, I will be the happy owner of my own car (eeeeeek!) in a few short months! When that happens, I'll be looking into getting a new job as well, somewhere working nights. I still want to stay home with A because I don't want a stranger raising my child. I'll most likely get a restaurant gig. Serving is easy, I'm really good at it, and the money is good. I mean, how awesome is it to work 3 hours and go home with $150 in your pocket. $50 an hour is not bad at all! Hopefully I'll be able to find a serving job in a decent restaurant fairly quickly. Fingers crossed!

I'm feeling great today, by the way. Kiddo went to bed at 11pm, woke up at 230am, 630am, then we took a short nap from 7 to 8, got up had some breakfast and took a totally awesome nap from 8 to 1030. I feel well rested and ready to take on the world! She is waking up now and wants lunch so I'm outta here! Have a good day!

Here is a sneak peek at our Christmas photos!

Even though it's blurry, this is one of my favorites.
More to come after cards have been received by all ;)

Happy Monday

Good morning all! It's Monday, and another day closer to Christmas! Sadly we're not getting a Christmas tree this year both for financial reasons and for lack of space. Our apartment is too small and adding in a tree would make it all the more cramped. So next year when we're in a bigger place, definitely!

This weekend was pretty good compared to the horrible week I had suffering with a constantly crying little one. She was actually in a really good mood, and still is surprisingly. What it was causing her to do this, I still don't know, but as long as it's over, I'm a happy momma. I can't imagine what it must be like for parents that have a baby with colic. My heart definitely goes out to them.

Saturday we spent the afternoon taking some family photos! They turned out great, and I'm really happy with our photographer ;)
I'll post some of the pictures after we send out our Christmas cards.... I don't want to give anything away!

I keep going back and forth on whether or not I should post a link to my blog on my Facebook, and I always end up not doing it. I think I'd rather have strangers of the interwebs reading about my personal life than people I actually know. Plus I don't need anyone else judging me.

I really need to work on my posts not being all over the place...maybe one of these days!

Have a great week!
(Oh, by the way, it's cold outside!!)

Times are a'changin

Let me start this by saying I am running on about 3 hours of sleep.

Now that that is out of the way, Oh.My.Cod. I am so effing tired. And not just from last nights lack of sleep, oh no. This entire week has sucked. Big ones.
My darling daughter is going through this stage, if you will, where if she isn't being held, she's crying. If she's hungry, which is always, she is crying. If you are trying to put the bottle in her mouth to feed her, she is crying. If you put her in her bassinet after taking nearly an hour to get her to sleep, instantly she is awake, crying. What.The.Fug. I don't get it. I don't understand why she is crying all the time. She also isn't napping like she used to. Now she'll take maybe one or 2 naps a day. Cat naps, not like her previous naps that lasted hours, these only last about 30 or 45 minutes. This week will live forever in my mind as "Hell Week."

Annnyhow. No matter how frustrated I get, I know that once the weekend comes, salvation has arrived. My dear, dear husband wont be working so he can stay up with her at night, and wake up with her in the morning. I will still get up and handle the overnight feedings, only because this ensures the Hubs will be rested enough to get up and take care of her once morning hits and she's ready to start the day.

Got to cut this one short, the little one has risen...
I'll post pictures later.